The safest place
by missweirdinabox
Summary: AU. 18-year old Gail kind of runs away from her parents but gets lost on her way. Holly will show up at some stage.
1. Chapter 1

**Little warning ahead - there may be some minor triggers in this chapter mostly on suicide thoughts, family and school issues, sexual harassment, and a theft (and maybe worse to come). I´m not from Canada so this story is possible in my country but there may be plot holes. I´m not a native speaker. Cameron is a fictional place. And yes, I know I changed Gails birthdate…**

Gail wasn´t a very lucky person. Had never been. Actually the happenings of the day were surely upsetting but not at all surprising. She had done everything wrong. Well, of course she had. How could she have been hat stupid? How could she have not thought about what to do with a lot of money any earlier? How could she have left that guy sit next to her? And, worst thing of all, how could she have fallen asleep?

When it all had already happened, Gail went over all her mistakes again and again, knowing she couldn´t change a thing about it. She couldn´t stop thinking though. How came all of this had happened to her? Why was she so stupid? Why, how, why?

First mistake had been the choice of place to put the money. No she hadn´t put it all in her underwear which by the way she would have been very uncomfortable with. While she had been sure there should have been some kind of bag in her parent´s home she could hide under her clothes, it turned out she had been wrong about that. She had been in a hurry the morning. She couldn´t get anything if she didn´t want to miss the bus. So Gail ended up deciding to put half of her money in the very bottom of her backpack, half of it in her handbag.

Second mistake had been when she had gotten to the bus and understood she wasn´t supposed to take her backpack on board. It would be in the freaking cargo area with just anybody who got out having access to it. Gail tried not to freak when the bus driver told her. But she did a little.

"Is there no way I can take it on board? Like buying an extra ticket or anything?"

"No more seats available, Miss. I´m sorry."

Of course there were no more seats available. She was Gail, in the end. She had held on to her backpack like it was her little baby before finally putting it into the cargo, aware of that she was drawing attention to herself, which, of course, made it all even worse.

It was then she finally made her third mistake. A guy next to her gave her a grin.

"So what you got in there? Drugs? Guns? Five thousand dollars?" That gave Gail the collywobbles. He had actually guessed the amount of money she was carrying with her in total.

"Whoa, don´t worry, just making a little fun. First bus trip on your own, hugh?"

"None of your business."

The guy shrugged. "Didn´t mean to bother you. Just remember I was pretty nervous on my first trip. Some years ago. Don´t worry, you´ll be fine."

Gail wasn´t a very trusting person. The man was young and surely charming but Gail didn´t care. She wanted him to leave her alone.

"So where are you headed? Not going to answer? Let me guess… Girl around eighteen years old? Travelling on her own? Hiding a very pretty face under her hoodie?"

Gail was trying not to smile or to be inviting of any kind while they got into the bus. She squeezed her bag with both her hands while she took her seat. The guy of course sat down next to her.

"Wha… I didn´t ask for company, you know."

"We´re on a booked out greyhound bus. You can´t really chose if you wish for company or not. By the way, I´m Tom. Want a biscuit?" And with a clumsy movement Tom offered her oreos, which kind of were Gails favourites.

"No thanks. Why can´t you sit somewere else?"

"Jesus, don´t be so distrustful. Just want a little chat. You look kinda… lonely. I have a feeling for that. Don´t mean to bother you. Just, you know. Maybe I can cheer you up."

"Yeah, well maybe you can´t. Just go. " But he didn´t go.

His words had hit her though. She was lonely.

She wasn´t just friendly to him from that moment on. But she did unbend slowly. Which in the end turned out to be a bad mistake. Then they left Toronto - Toronto, the city she had spent all her life in. It passed by and then disappeared while the bus kept driving and driving. It was a long trip to Vancouver. She had talked to him. Which to her later on felt the worst. He had played her false.

"So will you finally tell me where you´re headed?"he asked her. She still was cautious.

"You go first."

"That´s not fair, I asked first… Ah, it´s not a secret really. I´m going to Vancouver just for my job. I commute between Toronto and Vancouver a lot. It´s… not interesting at all, you know. Really boring, actually. But you, you´re interesting. Can´t figure out your story at all. And I´m good at it, you know?" Gail looked aside. "Yeah, sure. You probably tell that a lot to get people to tell you stuff."

"You think this bad of all people?"

"Kind of?"

"Fine. I don´t mean to make you tell me things you don´t want to talk about."

They were silent for a while. Why did Gail tell him? How was it any of his business?

"I´m going to Vancouver. Don´t know what I´m headed to really yet. I don´t know. It… My life sucks." He just looked at her and said nothing for a moment.

"So what´s your name?"

"Gail. I´m Gail."

"Well, Gail. You´ll be fine, you know. You´ll see."

Gail turned up her mouth. "Yeah, sure!"

"I mean it. Now do you want a cookie? I can see you love them cookies, too, you know?"

And Gail actually took a cookie, even though it was one of the five things her mother had taught her to never ever do.

Why had she trusted him that much? What mode had she been in? Had she been thinking just because she left her home behind she would be on a trip to Disneyland and suddenly people would be worth trusting? Was it that little bit of trust to a complete stranger that made her do her worst mistake?

Gail didn´t know how it happened. She had expected her restlessness would keep her awake. But sitting there next to that man who was kind to her, feeling herself diverging more and more from her life, she felt so warm and cozy and most of all terribly tired. It was a long trip in the end. And she hadn´t slept in weeks. No longer than 20 minutes straight, to be accurate.

She didn´t know how long she had slept before she woke up flinching when she realized the bus wasn´t driving and Tom was gone. She tried to orientate, looked out of the window, wondering why the bus had obviously made a stop in the smallest dump of Canada, while the bus took off again. Gail grabbed for her bag. It was gone. She kept looking around feeling quite some panic rising inside herself. Then she saw Tom outside the bus. With her backpack. Gail couldn´t restrain herself from shouting out. "Stop the bus, stop the bus!" She ran to the front exit. "Miss, are you sure about this? Grehound doesn´t even normally stop at Ca…" "That dude over there stole my luggage! Stop the bus!" "Are you sure he…" "STOP! The BUUUUS!" While the bus driver tried to ask Gail some more questions, Gail kept screaming and actually used some words that weren´t pretty. In the end, the bus driver let her out and took off. Gail probably didn´t even look after that goddamn bus leaving her in the middle of nowhere. A very accurate seeming image of that very moment was forever etched into her mind though.

Tom by then was out of sight (of course he was). Gail ran into just the direction she guessed he had been headed to.

"Tom," she kept screaming, "TOOOOM, SHOW YOURSELF!" Well, he didn´t. When she had run around enough to convince herself she would never ever find that man – which took her a while – she ran back to the tiny little village. An old man standing close to the place where the bus had left her took a curious look at her.

"Sir, can you help me? Some guy stole my backpack, have you seen him?"

"I don´t think so. I can call the police though if you want me to?"

Gail flinched. "Police? No! No, no police. It´s fine."

She then actually showed it was not fine at all as she repeatedly and quite wildly kicked a boarder stone once more yelling some rather nasty things. The old man looked a little snubbed while Gail´s temper tantrum passed. Gail looked back at him.

"Where am I, actually?"

"Do you not know?"

"Just got out of a greyhound bus by mistake."

"Greyhound busses don´t stop here."

"Where did you say I am?"

"This is Cameron."

"Cameron? Where´s Cameron?"

"Miss, seriously? Upper Ontario. Lake Superior Shore. We´re a few hundred miles east from Thunder Bay, Miss."

Gail´s jaw dropped open before she gave into another temper tantrum. While she already had been in the worst possible life situation, this was the one thing that could make everything just even worse.

"Are you sure you don´t need any help, young lady?"

"What? No. No, I´m totally fine. Thank you."

The old man, who by then seemed quite appalled, finally left. Gail was alone.

And there she was, stuck in the middle of nowhere, all by herself, going over all of her mistakes again and again, thinking how could I, why did he. Between the few houses of the township there was a square and Gail had a seat there on a little rock. She couldn´t cry. She just shivered wondering what she was supposed to do and whether god or destiny or whatever there might have been was trying to tell her she was supposed to end her life. She had no place left to go to, she had no money, she had no documents and she had no one she could have asked for help. There was no way she could have gone back home. Not now, not like this. Her parents should have found her note by now.

She had to figure something out though soon. It was march. Gail didn´t know a lot about death from exposure but she wasn´t sure she would even be capable to survive the night without a shelter. She didn´t have a lot of options left.

After sitting on that rock for she didn´t know how long, Gail stood up with a swing. She hadn´t been too fond of life recently. That´s what she had thought at least. But to her own surprise she felt a weird headiness, or maybe even anger telling her this was just NOT the right time to give up the ghost. If she wanted to die, she wanted to decide so herself – without some creepy destiny or whatever she would call it deciding for her.

Cameron didn´t have a lot to offer. As Gail roamed the little hick town, she spotted one gas bar, an Inn that looked surprisingly fancy and a petty grocery store. That was it. This place didn´t even seem to have a public school.

Gail decided to try the grocery store first. A little door bell rang when she stepped in making the cashier look up.

"Hi," said Gail. The cashier was a fat young girl that kind of reminded Gail of Miss Piggy.

"Can I help you?"

"Actually, I´m looking for a job. And a place to stay."

"Here?" The cashier sized Gail up.

"That is right."

"We don´t have any work here. Where are you from?"

"Toronto."

"Maybe you should look for a job in Toronto then."

"Do you maybe know any place where I can find a job? I´m willing to do anything, really."

"Right. I don´t think I can help you. But good luck trying anyways."

Gail stood still for a moment. The cashiers words made her feel crestfallen already. She then stepped out of the shop. This wouldn´t turn out easy, it seemed.

She next tried the gas bar. It was pretty run down. The man behind the counter looked in his fifties. He had little hair and a red face and was sweaty and overweight. Gail already wished to leave when she stepped in but she did ask. The man grinned at her in a way Gail didn´t like at all. "I get you a job, girl. How about you have a little nookie with me?" The man gestured in a way that made Gail want to throw up. As she stepped out the shop backwards she couldn´t stop herself from saying: "Thank you but I guess I´ll rather commit suicide."

"Think about it!" the guy cat-called at her as the door shut.

Now the Inn was the only place left. They had to have something. They just had to.

The Inn was both a Guesthouse and a bar, the latter was nearly empty when Gail stepped in. It was old-fashioned, but in a cozy way, with a fireplace and old dark furniture. The guy behind the bar wasn´t the youngest anymore. A young couple sat at a table, another mid-aged man was at the bar, having some coffee.

"No, we ain´t got any work in here. You know, Cameron isn´t the best place to get any work anyways. No business, few tourists. Maybe you should try some other town," the man behind the bar explained to her.

Gail felt like hitting her head on the bar. "I´m willing to do any job. Well, nearly any job. Is there really nothing you know? Somewhere around? Anything?"

"Can´t help you with that, Miss."

"Well, thank you!", Gail replied. It didn´t sound very friendly. "Do you have a room left though?" "Sure. Can I have your ID and a credit card?"

"I don´t have them with me right now."

"Well, then I don´t have a room. Come back with your ID and credit card."

Gail kept her tears back. "I will", she said and left.

Gail returned to the rock she had been sitting on before with even less options left. She could a) return to the gas bar guy to lose the little self esteem she had left or

b) randomly ring at peoples doors to do she didn´t really know what then or

c) break into some house or

d)hitchhike to another place which she wasn´t sure was possible because she obviously was at the end of the world (beneath the fact it was one of the five things her mother had taught her to never ever do, and she had already done one of them today and that hadn´t turned out well) or

e) hit the woods and risk freezing in the night.

None of these seemed good any way. It was then she heard somebody coming up behind her.

"Hello, excuse me…. Hello, there." It was the mid-aged man from the bar.

"WHAT?" Gail felt like hitting him or anybody near her.

"I couldn´t overhear your talk in the bar. Sorry for that? I know some place near where you might get a job though."

"Really?"

"There´s a campground outside town led by some sweet old lady. Her maid moved to the city just a week ago and I don´t think she has had one since. It´s not the most stylish place in the world, but… You know. Just wanted to help you."

"Tha… Thank you. How do I get there?"

"Well, it´s quite a walk down the forest? I don´t know, maybe 5 miles or so. Just, you know, down that road, head on straight – it´s right at the lake shore, you can´t really miss it."

"Really? Tha… thank you."

"You want me to give you a lift?"

"No. No."

"You fine?"

"No. Well, yes, I am. I´m fine. Thank you."

"Sure. Alright then. Good luck."

The man disappeared leaving Gail alone once again.

She went the direction he had told her. She started feeling a little uncomfortable though. What if there was no campground at all and that man had just sent her off to randomly fuck with her or, just a little worse, come after her? Gail had been afraid of walking the woods alone ever since she had been twelve. But with the options she had left trusting a complete stranger still seemed the most reasonable one. At least she hoped so. The longer she walked the more insecure did she feel about it though. It was really cold. The sounds of the forest scared her. And she couldn´t see even one little thing. He had messed with her. Of course he had. She was Gail, in the end. Why was she even still walking? The lake was really loud. What if he was following her? She hated woods.

Everything was so dark and creepy. Even if there was some place, how could she work here?

As she kept walking, the events of the day – the events of the past year kept crossing her mind. She could never stop thinking and she hated it. Last year had been horrible. Well, actually the last years had been horrible – Gail couldn´t even remember when the horribleness in her life had started to become rife. When had her mother stopped talking to her? When had she become the most hated kid in school? When had she started feeling any of her own actions were out of her own control? She couldn´t even remember anymore. She hardly even remembered when she had been in school, the place of her daily misery, the last time. Or how she had managed to keep her parents from finding out she had been cutting school for months. Gail had known that if they found out her life would have become even more miserable than it already had been. She had waited until her eighteenth birthday to leave though. It had been a few days ago. She hadn´t even celebrated for real.

The forest was so dark making Gail feel her own thoughts growing even darker. She had left a very short note for her parents. Gail had memorized the words, even if she hadn´t wanted to. 'I´m eighteen now so I can make my own decisions. Don´t look for me.' That had been it. 18 years she had spent with her parents. This had been her goodbye.

The forest trail seemed barely used. Parts of it were overgrown, making it hard for Gail to walk on. How could there be any place connected to civilization ahead?

Gail had been supposed to do her secondary school diploma in a few weeks. She wouldn´t have been admitted. She had planned her escape for weeks now, maybe even for months, maybe even for a year. She had to be careful. Her mother didn´t talk to her, but it didn´t keep her from spying. Gail had thought it through a lot. She hadn´t left before she had turned eighteen because she somehow did expect her parents to find her and bring her back as soon as they could. They were the police in the end. They always did find her and once already had. Also, Gail had those 5000 Dollars her grandmother had put on a bank account for her. Turning eighteen she finally had disposition over that money. Gail did consider herself stupid – stupid enough to obviously never finish secondary school – but she wasn´t stupid enough to leave without any money on the side. Gail knew about the destiny of street kids. 5000 Dollars would have left her some time though to get along. Find a stupid job for stupid people. Get her a stupid room somewhere. But in the end, she still was stupid.

Some noise of cracking branches drew attention to Gail. Was there a bear or something? Gail had once seen a bear outdoors and had been afraid of them ever since even more than she was afraid of woods. For a moment she totally froze. But just then she realized she was probably close to her designation.

It was dozing already. There was a little light in the forest not too far ahead. Never ever had she felt this relieved. She started running towards it. The closer she got the surer she was: That campground actually existed. There was a little house and an even area with just very few campers. A campground! Gail wasn´t one for prayers really, but what she did that moment was probably praying. 'Please, let them have something for me. Just a teeny tiny place to stay. I´ll sleep in the cellar if I have to, I´ll clean the worst dirtiest bathrooms on my knees, I´ll kill cockroaches if I have to… Just… Let them have a job for me, a place to stay, anything… please, dear God!'

The house looked like it had been built in the seventies and would have seemed really depressing in any other place with its grey shapelessness and its obvious need for fresh paint, but in a weird way there was something friendly about it, which Gail thought was probably about the place itself, the green grass and the trees and the sound of the hidden shore. The desk was abandoned. "Hello?" Gail screamed into its emptiness. A young man showed up who didn´t look a lot older than Gail.

"Good evening. How can I help you?" He was pale and skinny with light blue eyes and a smile that seemed a little off, all in all a complete nerd prima facie. Gail both liked him straight away and felt repelled, which was kind of like her standard reaction to nerds.

"I actually want to talk to the owner of the campground."

"Do you have anything to complain about?"

"No, actually… I´m looking for a job."

"Aah… Just wait a second, I´ll get her…"

Actually Gail waited a lot longer than a second, but finally the dude returned, at his side an old lady that everyone would just have loved at first sight. She was petite and wore a simple dress and some old-fashioned earrings and had shoulder-length grey hair and had the bluest eyes and the friendliest smile ever, and if someone had told Gail this little woman had spent her life being a ballet dancer, she would have totally bought it.

"Good evening. Dov here just told me you are looking for a job?" Gail nodded.

"Leave us alone, Dov. Thank you. So, I´m actually looking for somebody to help me out a little. You would have to clean the bathrooms and the kitchen, maybe mow the lawn, do a little selling in the shop in the morning, and some desk duty, too. Have you ever worked on a similar job?"

Gail slowly shook her head. The old lady examined her from top to bottom. She seemed sad for a second, and Gail expected her to send her away, but then the woman gave her the friendliest smile. "Well, I´m sure you´ll learn. You look like a bright girl, and at this time of the year there aren´t too many guests anyways, so you can get used to it. I can´t pay you too much though, but you can stay here. There´s a little apartment upstairs for staff. Do you want to stay there?"

Gail nodded. She felt like hugging that little woman or like falling at her feet thanking her or just like crying.

"Do you have any luggage?" Gail shook her head.

"Do you have your ID card?" Gail shook her head.

"Do you want an employment agreement?" Gail shook her head once again.

"Nobody would have to know you´re working here based on an employment agreement." Gail bit her lips.

"Well, actually we can deal with that tomorrow. I have a hotpot on the stove. Do you want to eat with us? I´ll show you the apartment then. Oh, but where are our manners? What´s your name, young lady?"

"I´m… My name is Gail. Gail Peck."

"Alright. I´m Rose. Rose Stewart, but just call me Rose. Now come, have dinner with us. You look like you haven´t eaten all day."

**Not what I originally had in mind and not sure anybody will be reading this and not sure I won´t want to rewrite it all at some stage but anyways. Had the idea for this story like years ago but somehow thought it would fit G/H. Holly will show up at some stage…**

**Edit - already rewrote some stuff.**


	2. Chapter 2

**So here´s chapter 2, hope you won´t hate it.**

Gail never ever slept as deep as the first night on Cameron Campgrounds again. It didn´t even feel like sleeping. It felt like a dark black unconsciousness. When she slowly awoke the next morning she wished to stop feeling or breathing. Why had she come here? How could she do a job if she couldn´t do her secondary diploma? Her body felt like a dirty rag. She didn´t even have a deodorant or just anything to wear.

Gail would have maybe never gotten out of bed had Rose not tapped on her door at some stage. "Gail?" "Just a minute." Gail got dressed with a towel Rose had given to her before she opened the door. "Are you alright, Girl?" "Yes. Sure. I´m sorry I slept this long." "No, it´s fine. I got you some clothes of my granddaughter. Hope they suit you." Rose handed Gail a little bunch of clothes that didn´t look like Gail style at all but it did look terribly cozy. "How long do you plan to stay here, Gail?" "I… I don´t know." "Hm. I think you should go get some clothes. Do you have any money?" Gail shook her head. "Well, I´ll pay you some of your wage in advance. I do expect you to stay here for a while then though. Is that fine with you?" Gail nodded. "Dov is coming over in one hour or so. I´ll ask him to drive you to town so you can get something. It´s quite a ride though, there are no stores in Cameron… Well, you´ll see. Just get ready and have breakfast with me. I want you to start working by tomorrow." Gail nodded. She had a quick shower and then got into those foreign clothes. Rose had chosen well as they did fit her. Gail looked at herself in the mirror. It wasn´t more than a simple pair of something she would have called yoga pants, a black shirt and a grey wool cardigan but Gail felt she looked like a completely different person, like she was a lot friendlier than she actually was. Those clothes were terribly soft and cuddly and smelled so good she wanted to completely cave into them.

Roses kitchen always smelled like vanilla cake. Even when she cooked a lentil stew that sweet homely smell would never be banished. Gail loved it from the first day. The walls were covered with photos.

"Do you know how to make pancakes, Gail?" Rose asked her with her sweet smile. Gail shook her head. "Come here, I´ll show you." It was the first thing Gail learned from Rose. Mixing flour and butter and eggs and milk and baking powder and, of course, vanilla essence to this deliciously smelling batter one just wanted to eat straight away without even baking it. While they did bake though Gail had a look on some of those photos. "Look Gail. This is me when I was probably just a little older than you." Gail would have known without Rose telling her. The young woman on that black and white photo had the brightest eyes and the most adorable smile just as Rose had now. "These are my husband and my son. They died in a car crash." Gail looked at Rose. She didn´t know how to react. "I´m sorry." Rose gave a sad smile. "It was more than twenty years ago. Now look, this is my daughter in law. And this is my granddaughter. Well, by now she´s in her twenties though." Gail looked at the happy faces on the photos. Roses husband had a south European look and the biggest brown puppy eyes Gail had ever seen. Those he had obviously handed on to his son and his granddaughter. The girl on the picture was about ten years old. She wore huge glasses and her clumsily posed smile exposed her braces while she was cuddling some golden retriever. Somehow her innocently nerdy look made Gail smile. She then realized she was actually wearing the clothes of this little girl who by now was a woman. Rose softly tapped on Gails shoulder. "Now let´s not let the pancakes burn. Can you set the table?"

Just half an hour later Dov arrived. Though Gail had the impression he wasn´t thrilled to go shopping with her they soon set off to town with Dovs black Jeep that seemed a little too big for him alone. Gail generally hated people close to her age, and Dov was obviously one of them. She wanted to try her best to be nice though. He was with Rose in the end. "So, how long have you been working for Rose?" she insecurely tried to start the conversation. "Oh, I don´t really work for Rose. Just helping her out a little right now. She´s like family, you know? Holly… Her granddaughter and I kind of are best friends." Dov smiled like he had told her he was about to be crowned emperor. It reminded Gail of why she tended to be revolted by nerds. "But you, how did you get here? To Cameron? For a job?" Gail hesitated. She didn´t really want to answer. "Well I was headed to another place. Got out a Greyhound bus by mistake." "What? Since when do Greyhound Busses stop in Cameron?" Gail huffed. "Anyways I´ve been thinking about you. No clothes, no papers, nothing at all? Walking through half a forest to a campground all by yourself to get a job? I´ve been thinking about you," Dov repeated darting a look at Gail that made her feel totally uncomfortable. "Don´t get me wrong, I´m just looking out for those who are like family to me. I don´t want Rose to get into any trouble." Gail said nothing for a minute. "Don´t you worry too much, I´m quite a troubleshooter. And by the way, I don´t know if you want to creep me or something but honestly, thinking about other people´s life is totally pathetic. Like, you don´t have an own life to think about?" "Oh really?" "Yeah really." "Well I think… I think you´re wrong about that. I…" He noisily breathed out but never happened to finish this last sentence. "Oh God," Gail moaned while they drove on not talking another word to each other.

Compared to Toronto, the town was still like the end of the world, compared to Cameron though it seemed like bursting life. There even was a shopping mall. While Gail walked around, checking out shops and prizes – Dov following her like a watchdog – she bit her lip a lot. Basically all clothes seemed to be for people above Gails age, and beneath that, if she didn´t want to look like a rag-and-bone woman, she wouldn´t be able to buy much more than eight pieces. She finally moved Dov to pity her even though he avoided looking at her while talking. "There´s a second hand shop a lot of girls of my school went shopping to outside the mall. They have nice stuff that is not too expensive. Maybe we should go there." Gail bit her lip even a little more. She didn´t like the idea of wearing other peoples clothes, smelling other peoples smell, touching cloth that had touched other people´s skin. She didn´t have a lot of choice though.

She had to admit there was something cool about 'roseate' when they got there though. It was a mixture of café and second hand shop that had an incredibly metropolitan vibe. The shelves were full to the brim with clothes in any imaginable colours and patterns, shapes and sizes. Gail started to rummage whatever would fit her. She was really insecure when it came to clothes though. Gail knew guys thought her to look sufficiently pretty. It was just she had never thought of herself that way and whenever she got dressed up she thought of herself as of a little girl disguising herself. Once she had tried three or four things she kind of slowly got desperate and risked a peep outside her fitting room. "Dov." Dov sat on a chair, reading some women´s magazine he had found lying around and obviously trying to look very casual. "I need your help." Dov raised an eyebrow. "I´m sorry. I… Can you… you know?" She stepped out her cabin. He looked amused while he took his time sizing her up. Gail looked away, her arms crossed. "You look… fine. You want me to pick some stuff for you?" "NO! I mean, no thanks. Just tell me if it looks alright."

Dov turned out to be a surprisingly reliable advisor and Gail ended up buying more clothes than she had actually had in her backpack. They then hit back to the mall because Gail had to get some things she wouldn´t buy second hand and Dov actually wasn´t supposed to help her chosing those. As she didn´t have a lot of money left it didn´t take her too long though. By the end of their shopping trip she had a whole bunch of second hand clothes and lots of the simplest cotton underwear ever – now who would have thought that of her?

**This may sound weird, but I´m quite a little insecure right now because I really didn´t expect more than 3 followers maximum and thought I would write this story mostly for myself, which also means at my own speed, which means slowly, because I tend to write and rewrite and then rewrite again a lot… Now as there are some readers I will try not to annoy you too much and just write and publish, but having said that I still might rewrite a lot, hope you don´t get a message everytime I change something and maybe some of you´ll just chose to read when the story´s complete… Anyways maybe you expected something else outgoing from chapter one and won´t read any further anyways… Tell me if I tend to get too lost into details tough ;-).**


	3. Chapter 3

**Here we go again. Hope you don´t mind some non-Rookie-Blue-Characters. It´s a slow chapter. Hope you won´t dislike it. **

„The laundry room is half under water, it´s disastrous. Made me slip and almost break my neck. The washing machine has probably leaked. Oh, and one of the windows in the restrooms has cracked. Leaves all the cold in. The men´s rooms, of course."

Gail groaned. She was now working on Cameron Campgrounds for nearly a week, and in this little time Mr. Dean had managed to lodge 9 complaints to her – which meant he probably had lodged even more complaints to Rose. All of them – as far as Gail had checked them – had turned out to be something the word 'exaggeration' was insufficient to describe. Rose had given her very clear instructions on how to deal with Mr. Dean though – "You really don´t need to check his complaints, but please, my dear, stay calm and polite."

Which had turned out to be just about the hardest part of her job.

Gail clothed her face in the fakest smile ever since John Cages smiling therapy.

"Thank you Mr. Dean, I will follow your suggestions when I´m done here."

Mr. Dean didn´t seem happy. He stood still at the reception looking at Gail while he nervously kept tipping on the counter. It totally drove Gail insane.

"WHAT?" she finally yelled at him, reminding herself promptly she was supposed to be friendly. It only took her a second to get back to fake smile face.

"You´re not doing anything. I just told you I nearly broke my neck and you pretend you´re busy sitting here while you´re doing nothing."

"FINE!" Fake smile. "I´ll check it."

"Thank you." He turned around and hummed a little "Paleface" which was what he kept calling her mostly to himself when she upset him. Gail told herself most of the time she didn´t really mind. She had been called worse.

Gail then got up and decided to at least check the restrooms as it was time to have a look at them anyways. Checking restrooms had turned out to be a quite important part of her job but, unexpectedly, not the hardest at all. While Gail had at first been totally disgusted by the thought of cleaning other´s peoples piss away, she had found out to her very surprise she enjoyed cleaning restrooms. She would have never confessed that to anybody else of course and whenever somebody came in while she was cleaning she deliberately put on her dark face. Still there was a certain quality about it she hadn´t expected. There was a good thing about making dirty things look shiny and smell good. It was cathartic.

It was not that Gail just loved everything about this place though. No, actually there was something weird about Cameron Campgrounds, which Mr. Dean seemed quite to be the epitome for. Dov had told Gail Mr. Dean actually lived on the campground. He – as far as Dov had told her – even had offered Rose an immense sum of money so she would keep her place open all year long. Rose had declined the money though, but she had demanded sufficient money per day to keep her business economic and they obviously had come to a deal. In conlusion, Cameron Campgrounds was probably the only campground all over Canada that was open all year. It was beyond Gail though why somebody who could afford a sum of money as Mr. Dean had reputedly offered to Rose would chose to spend winter in a Caravan in the loneliness and bloody cold of Cameron, and it was even more beyond her why someone like Rose would chose to accommodate someone like Mr. Dean 365 days a year. It generally seemed Rose had a fondness for strange human beings, just as they seemed to have a fondness for her. Gail hadn´t spent a lot of time of her life on campgrounds. But the people who stranded at Roses campground just seemed… not the way Gail thought normal campers should be. Actually they seemed weird which totally confused Gail in a sense similar to the way nerds confused her.

There was Dorothy Stiller who was so fat Gail wasn´t sure she should generally avoid watching her or try to find out how that creature even managed to walk through the rather slender door of her caravan. Dorothy also had no teeth. She did have choppers, but she wasn´t actually always wearing them. Then there was Anna Hailey, some single mom who seemed to suffer from anthropophobia as every time she tried talking to Gail she seemed to swallow her tears as well as her own tongue – if she managed to talk at all. Fortunately her daughter was just two years old. Gail could not imagine though how that mother should one day find a way to bring her child to school. Then there was Ben Suffork, a dude in his twenties who was incredibly thin and incredibly tall and had the tallest hands Gail had ever seen, but most of all he started to philosophize on everything that caught his eye. Gail still remembered her first meeting with this particular young man. Dov had just instructed her on Reception duties when Ben had come along.

"Can I help you?" Gail had asked totally unknowing.

"I doubt so. I doubt anyone can help me. But we can give it a try."

Reacting to Gails already freaked out face Dov had choked his laughter from that moment on.

"I´ll try my best?"

"Who are you? And where did you come from?"  
>"What?"<br>"Who are you? And where did you come from?"  
>"I´m from Toronto, actually?"<br>"That´s not what I´ve been asking."

"O-kay?"

"Look at this lamp. Why is it here? Do you know?"

"Because Mrs. Stewart bought it and put it there?"

"You see? Told you you can´t help me."

By this time Dov had done something that half looked like falling of his chair and half looked like searching something under the desk. Which had made Gail hit him moderately flimsy on the back of his head.

Yes indeed, the guests of Cameron Campgrounds made Dov look like the king of coolness. But he wasn´t. Actually regarding he wasn´t working for Rose, he spent a pitiful amount of time on this place. Like he didn´t have a life or a job or anything. For a short time, Gail had seriously been psyched out a little as he had constantly followed her around the first two days. The worst moment of these was when she was standing in the kitchen getting something from the fridge. As she closed the door finding Dov standing behind it. She nearly got a heart attack. After a second of shriek she took a bite of her piece of cake and talked to him with her mouth full.

"You know Dov, I don´t know why you´re doing this, sticking on me like life bores you out of your mind or like you like to creep people or something? But just so you know, I´m neither going to let you witness I´m part of major criminal gang, nor am I going to let you slip into my panties. No matter how much you stick around."

The next second Gail wished a little – just a very invisible little bit – she hadn´t talked like that to him. Dov first looked like a kicked puppy, then quite grossed out. Then he left. Five minutes later he returned though making her feel mad again straight away.

"What is it Dov?"

"I still think I don´t have lots of reasons to trust you. And I just wanted to let you know I surely don´t have any interest in your panties. Just in case you think you´re irresistible or something."  
>Gail looked at his feet while she bit her lips. Not that she had any desires towards him, nor did she think of herself as irresistible. Then why did she mind his words at all? And – even worse – why couldn´t she keep herself from showing him she did?<p>

"Fine."

Dov took a little breath. "Ehm… I don´t think you´re… And you´re very pretty. But I´m into… Anyways. You… Just thought you might need some help?"

"I´ll get you if I need help."

Gail still looked at his feet.

"Alright."

There was some awkward silence before he left. But somehow they got along since. Not like friends or something. But he did help her and actually they sometimes played with his game console together – Gail was even quite sure he was her first real life playmate ever since she had stopped playing in sandpits. In a weird way most of the time Gail did enjoy his company even though he kind of talked too much. He talked a lot about how he thought things were supposed to be done and he talked a lot about cars and he talked a lot about the guests of the campground and actually he talked a lot about Roses granddaughter, Holly, who obviously was not only his best friend, but also unbelievably perfect. She had lived in Toronto for a few years now doing her Bachelor in Human Biology to soon start her medical study, and from Dovs telling she was just like funny and sweet and caring and pretty and whatever any person was supposed to be. Gail let him talk. His own life did not seem to be great so why not letting him tell nice things about someone close to him?

And then above all this there was Rose. Having spent a week on this weird weird place Gail didn´t know what to make of her anymore and when Rose wasn´t around Gail sometimes felt the same strange ambivalence towards her she felt towards all of this weird place. She sometimes started thinking she should try and save as much of her wage as possible to at some stage continue her journey to Vancouver. None of that would have appeared to her though as soon as Rose was around her. She was always kind. She taught Gail cooking and how to use the washing machine and had sweet little chats with her and didn´t make a big deal of it if Gail did something wrong and always asked if she was fine and if she needed something. Everyone in the world would have felt at ease with her around.

They always ate together. One evening after Gails first week they made some fresh Pizza. Rose was good at both Italian foods and anything that needed to be baked. As Gail rolled the pastry Dov hung up a new photo on Roses kitchen wall. Rose looked over Gails shoulder.

"Very well my dear. So now, first week on your new job. I think we´re going to have good bottle of wine tonight. You´re doing well, my dear."

Gail smiled.

"Do you still like it here?"

Gail nodded. Of course she nodded.

"Really? You don´t think people here are strange?"

Gail very much concentrated on her pastry.

"You don´t think… I´m strange? Not a bit?"  
>"Why should I think that?" Gail didn´t look up.<p>

"Well please don´t tell me you don´t think there´s weird people around."

Gail bit her lips. "Maybe. I don´t know."

"I know it´s strange, but just in case you´ve wondered, I do like this kind of people."  
>"Sure she does," Dov added, "That´s why you got that job here."<p>

Fortunately Gail was already busy with the pastry so it was really not hard for her to hide his words once again stung her.

"Dov! Leave her alone. You can be so insensitive."

Actually Roses words made Gail feel even worse. Dov in the meantime just had hung up the picture.

"Now look at that. Thank you Dov. It really was about time I got a more recent one."

"It´s pretty," Dov smiled.

Gail got a little curious and looked up from her work. "Who is it?"  
>"That´s Holly. You know, my granddaughter."<br>"Yeah, how could I forget?"

Gail who was just done with her pastry rolling came a little closer to have a look at the girl she expected to look, well, nerdy. She was quite surprised though when she looked at the photo. Even though the young woman on it still had a hint of the ten year old braces girl on the other picture, she was pretty. Really pretty. Even her glasses looked kind of good. Her body and her big brown eyes and her long brown hair and particularly her smile made her look more like an actress than like a medicine student though.

"Wow, she´s… not ten."

"I told you she was pretty," Dov said.

"Yeah, right."

"She´s actually coming for a visit. Just for a week. It´s kind of a spontaneous as she´s done with most of her studies. I think her Bachelor will turn out really well. Thank god. Anyways, just ten days and she´ll be here. You´ll love her, Gail. I´m so happy she´s coming. She´s been so busy the last years," Rose told while she continued preparing the Pizza. Gail showed a smile that felt nearly as fake as the one she had shown Mr. Dean. She really wanted to like Roses granddaughter. She really did. But thinking of her own miserable being that Holly girl that obviously was a very successful student and obviously very much liked by at least Dov and Rose and really busy with her Toronto life and as if that wasn´t bad enough looked like really beautiful didn´t make her feel good. She didn´t want to hate her. She didn´t want to hate Dovs best friend and Roses granddaughter. But she felt she kind of did already.

**I might change the last chapter (2) to not repeat myself too much. And still rewrite everything. Sorry.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Here we go again. I´m sorry but just to tell straight away, I don´t ship Gail with Dov ;-P. Sorry too that this story develops slowly. Hope you don´t mind.**

Holly had had a really good year. That was what she was telling herself at least when she got on her bus. She had decided to go home too short in advance to get an affordable flight. As she still was a student in the end the bus was always the right choice in favor of her bank account. While she got on the bus she kind of sensed though she wouldn´t be going to enjoy this ride. She needed a time out, that was for sure and the reason why she had decided to go home. The eighteen hours driving all by herself without reading – it would have made her sick within minutes – she looked ahead to seemed a little too much of a time out though.

The last months had been so busy she hadn´t really happened to think. Well, actually she had thought an awful lot, just not about her life. Not that her life was disastrous. Actually, her life was really great and really bustling. In the four years she had spent in Toronto by now she had built up a solid circle of friends, she had done volunteer work in the Toronto General Hospital that had resulted in her first little job, and above all, she had studied, studied and studied. She had visited more classes than she needed to, she had always been to some summer school, she had become an always a-grade-student. The last year she had given it everything, she had gotten herself a job as a research assistant at the University which was quite an honor for an undergraduate student, she had gotten three scholarships and some months ago one of her essays had finally been published in the MAQ for the first time.

She knew was lucky though. Medicine and everything connected to it wasn´t really like her job but more like her hobby she had been into since a really early age. What had seemed kind of creepy and non-childlike first and totally uncool later had turned out a blessing when she had started studying. Learning and researching felt like something she had done all her life and wasn´t too hard for her, so she still was left with enough time and energy to do what students just did – go out, meet people, make friends, go dancing, get drunk, have dates. She had dated quite some girls the last year. Right now there was actually a cute new fellow student who had started her job in TGH on Hollys side just a few days ago, and Holly at least imagined she was getting some vibes from her. It had turned out she had a thing for hitting on straight girls though so she had decided to soft-pedal for now. While the bus left Toronto she tried to focus on the thought of her studies at first and then on that particular girl. It didn´t help though. Even before they had left the suburbs behind, the bad stuff happened to come to her mind, and it wouldn´t let itself be chased away by any good thoughts.

Holly was lovesick. Double lovesick, actually. It had been nearly a year since she had finally managed breaking up with Amy, and it had been seven months since she had lost contact to her mom – both things that had basically not affected her at all since she had been more than busy writing seminar papers and essays and most of all her bachelor thesis and doing research and doing her jobs and kind of rushing into parties and looking for new girls. Well, she had thought it hadn´t affected her. But then, not yet two weeks ago, she had been on some party with her friend Lisa to celebrate she had given in her Bachelor thesis. She had gotten a little drunk. Actually quite drunk as it seemed, which was weird by itself because she wasn´t seventeen anymore and she really knew her limits. Not this time as it seemed though, as just three hours after the party started she had hung in her friends arms crying first for Amy and then for her mom like a little baby. The morning after Lisa had made her some coffee with lemon – which by the way had tasted pretty sick - and explained her the nausea and hot flushes Holly had recently suffered from did probably not announce premature menopause or something and that she should better take a break. And there was only one place in the world Holly could imagine to go to for taking a break.

And, oh dear, as she sat in that goddamn bus with those thoughts she had avoided for so long spinning in her head, she really wished she was already there. Holly spent most of that drive watching out of the window and silently brushing her tears away.

When she finally arrived got to town she was really glad as she saw Dov waiting for her from the bus window already. He didn´t look like the rural life was doing him good however. He was even paler and skinnier than she remembered him and looked kind of crooked. Maybe moving up here hadn´t been the right thing to do for him in the end. He was obviously glad to see her anyways, warmly hugged her and insisted on carrying her luggage to the car no matter how much she squawked making her realize she had really missed him and she had missed home. She did manage not to cry though when they hit the road. They hadn´t seen each other in a long time and there was so much to talk about Holly hardly knew where to begin.

"So how do you like your life up here? Figured anything out recently? Are you coming along?" she finally asked. She apparently hadn´t chosen a good beginning of conversation though.

"Ehm… I don´t know… Why don´t we talk about you first? So you´re like the new Linda Buck now?"

"Is it that bad? I´m sorry."

"Hmmmnaaaw… It´s great actually. I´ve come to spend a lot of time with Rose. You know, helped her out a little when Jenny quit."

"And she let you do that?"

"She didn´t have much of a choice. Offered me to employ me actually, but, you know… I don´t plan to stay forever. Anyways there´s a new girl now."  
>"There is? Who is she?"<p>

"She´s not from here. Actually she´s really weird. And a little mean, too. She came from out of nowhere. One evening she just stood there with nothing but the clothes she was wearing. No luggage, no papers, no money, nothing at all. Said she got off a greyhound bus by mistake. In Cameron."

"What? How should that happen?"

"I don´t know. Your grandma kind of adopted her though. She´s sorta… weird. Really pretty tough. Looks like Snow-white. Just… blonde. And really fragile somehow. There´s some rumors about her in the village."

"Sounds like the girl from the bottom of the lake."

"Yeah. I hope she´s not… I don´t know. Can´t figure her out at all." Dov for a second looked at Holly and smirked. "I think you´ll hate her. She´s nothing like you. I mean, you´re pretty, too, of course, but everything else…"

"Okay."Holly frowned.

"But you? Still planning to tell your grandma that you´re gay?"

"Dov."Holly gave him a rather desperate look. "She´s… she´s all the family I have right now. Plus, she´s – grandma. I should be able to talk to her about my life. I _want_ to be able to talk to her about my life."

"Maybe, but, you know, she´s… she´s really old. I mean, young people know that… they are… liberal, but your grandma, she might think you have some bad disease? Well, she´s great and understanding and everything, but that´s what she might have learned in school and, in the end she´ll have a heart attack or something, because, as I said, she is old? Plus you know… I´m still thinking it might just be a phase."

"Dov, it´s not a phase." Holly rolled her eyes. "I´m not twelve. I´m gay. God, I can´t believe we´re still discussing this."

"Yes, well as far as I remember you weren´t gay before you went to college. And I think, that´s what some girls do when they go to college. Try something new. Try something exciting. And, really, I can see why you would like women, because they´re… gorgeous, but, you know, that doesn´t mean you never ever…" He shrugged.

"I was never straight. I was just never in love before I went to University. Jesus. I don´t know why I still call you like my friend right now."

Dov smiled. "Rather like family, isn´t it?"

"Yes." Holly gave him a slightly unfriendly grin. "That must be why."

Rose came out of the house as soon as Dovs Jeep drove up her driveway. When Holly saw the old little woman she didn´t even understand herself how she could have kept herself away from this place for so long. She jumped out of the car and ran right into the open arms of her sweet little grandmother.

"My sweetie!" Rose said as she embraced her. "Are you alright?" Holly really didn´t want to cry. But right there once again her thoughts and feelings did what they wanted to and once again she did. A whole lot of crying it had been the last few days. And so they stood there for a while, Holly in Roses arms until she finally could stop weeping. "Now come in my dear, I´ve made some apricot cake for you." Holly nearly started crying again just because her grandma had made her favorite cake. She again nearly started crying when she got into the kitchen seeing all those family photos and smelling that particular grandmas-kitchen-vanilla-smell that had been there as long as she could think back. It was so good being here even though it was also a little horrible. "Come here, my sweetie, have a seat. I´ll make us some coffee. Or better hot chocolate. You, too, Dov, come in. Now, now, so good you´re here, isn´t it? Dov, maybe you can get Gail so she´ll have some cake with us?"

"I´ll go," Holly said. "Just want to have look around," she added as her grandmother looked at her a little disagreeing.

"But you don´t know her."

"Don´t worry, I´ll find her. Dov´s described her pretty thoroughly on our way here."

Rose darted another disagreeing look at Dov. "Very well then. She´s probably cleaning the laundry room right now. Don´t look around too much sweetie, the cake is still warm."

Cameron Campgrounds needed a renovation. Holly was objectively aware of that and also of the fact her grandmother would probably not undertake that anymore. As Rose had reached the age she was supposed to retire already she wasn´t even sure why her grandmother still ran the campground. Objectively that was. When she was being totally honest with herself, she couldn´t imagine this place any different from the way it was. It was the place of her first memories, the place she had spent a lot of her childhood and most of her happy memories at, the place she knew inside out, the place she even when she hadn´t been happy had always felt secure at. While strolled a little while she went to the washhouse, inhaled the smell of the wet grass, checked if the trees she had used to climb with Dov or to sit under to read some weird textbook still stood. They did. The washhouse still looked the same as well even if the paint slowly spalled. And there the new girl was. Gail was cleaning the floor on her knees. She wore a white tunic and white sandals from Rose and didn´t even bother looking up as Holly leaned against the door frame. Holly thought the girl even seemed to deliberately wear a sullen look.

Even before Holly had figured out she was into women she had been intimidated by pretty girls. Now this girl was cleaning a laundry room on her knees in ugly clothing with a repellent face and she still managed to be easy on the eyes which to Holly seemed to be quite an accomplishment. She really didn´t know what to say to her. But as the girl didn´t seem to react to her presence at all she finally had to say something.

"So you´re that mysterious girl from the bottom of the lake I guess?"

Dumb. Gail finally looked up glancing a dart at Holly as if she had been puked on. Holly immediately wished to bite her tongue off.

"I´m sorry. I´m Roses granddaughter…"

Gail surveyed her top to bottom. "You´re Holly," she then stated before she got ready to continue cleaning the floor.

Holly smiled insecurely. "That´s right. There´s… Rose made some cake. I just wanted to ask you if you´ll join us for a coffee klatsch?"

Dumb again.

Gail sighed. She didn´t even look up. "No, thank you. I´ll just get this done." She then finally looked at Holly doing something that was probably meant to be a smile.

"I´m really not hungry right now. Maybe I´ll have some later. Thank you for asking though."

Holly still smiled insecurely. "Alright. So see you later then, Gail."

As Holly went back to Roses kitchen she thought about what Dov had told her about that girl and what she better should have said and if she had any repulsive quality she hadn´t been aware of so far. She even thought about it while she was having her cake and some hot chocolate chit-chat.

**So this was fast, wasn´t it? Hope you don´t dislike it.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay, I´ll try. This chapter might contain minor triggers. Slow story still.**

Gail couldn´t sleep. Her first days at Cameron Campgrounds she had decided to never think about her life before her escape again. Some of the time that worked but when it did, it didn´t make her feel as good as she had expected. It made her feel shallow. Most of the time it didn´t work though anyways which wasn´t any better. The voices or looks or smells of the people she had left behind kept following her as they wanted to. When she cleaned she felt her mother standing behind her pointing on every spot she might have missed, or she could hear her making a snark about her unworthy job. When she spoke to the campground guests she would remember the way Lindsay who had been her best friend when she had been seven or eight had one day started falling silent looking at Gail with that superior grin as soon as she had drawn near. When she felt somebody observed her while she was working – she happened to feel observed quite often – she remembered Josh with his blank expression and his cold half closed eyes. Gail wished to never see him or Lindsay again.

In the night it got the worst though. As soon as she lay in bed she felt their presence, their contemptuous looks on her skin, she felt the fear she had felt when she had been twelve, when she had been sixteen, she felt her shame when Lindsay for the first time had murmured, "uugh, I touched Gail Peck." (How old had they been then? Ten?) or when Josh had told her, "You´re not like Lindsay at all, are you?" with that face she had never managed to read, she remembered her mothers hard silent face, and they didn´t come alone, they came along with their friends and family and anybody showing Gail they did have their good lifes and their good loves while she alone wasn´t able to get anything right. It made her want to scratch her skin open. When it got too bad she stood up and went outside to the lake shore. The wind and the sound of the surge were not the best pain killers she had ever tried but they did numb her a little.

The night after Holly had come to Cameron it got pretty bad. Gail had skipped dinner with Holly and Rose claiming she wanted to be on her own in spite of knowing there wasn´t anything desirable about being alone. She had already felt weirdly sick when she had gotten to her apartment to have bleak pumpernickel for diner. When she went to bed it got worse, and when the clock hit two am she hurt up to her fingertips. Having tossed and turned in her bed for hours, Gail got up, got dressed and went downstairs. She first went to Roses room, stood in front of the door as she had done it before, knowing she would never knock. She couldn´t wake up her boss in the middle of the night just because she was miserable – not even Rose.

On her way out Gail passed Hollys room. The door was open and the light was on. Gail glanced inside as she didn´t want to be seen. Holly wasn´t there. Her room was very simple with white walls and basic wooden furniture, a brimful bookshelf and a pencil drawing portraying two young girls being the most remarkable eyecatchers. For a second Gail remembered how she had seen Roses rundown house for the first time and how it had exuded warmth and a certain beauty that very moment in spite of not really looking extraordinary in any way. Hollys room reminded her of that, and she had to choke her impulse to just step in.

_Hollys room. _Gail shook her head and stepped outside to let the fucking cold embrace her.

Gail didn´t mean to have breakfast with Rose and Holly – no matter how bad it made her feel – but at eight o´clock somebody faintly knocked at her door. It was Holly.

"Hi."

"What is it?"  
>"Rose sent me. To get you for breakfast."<p>

"Ah. Ehm… No thanks, I´ll just eat here."  
>Holly looked behind Gail.<p>

"She said if you won´t eat with us she´ll dismiss you."

"What?"  
>Holly bit her lips. "So you´re coming?"<br>"No!?"  
>Holly nodded and looked at the floor. "Okay… I´ll… I´ll just tell her you´ll be down in five minutes."<p>

As Holly left, Gail slammed the door shut, grabbed her clothes from the night and threw them on the floor. How did Rose have the right to tell her what to do apart from her job? She then tried to calm down, counted to hundred and went downstairs. Holly and Rose stood at the stove making pancakes. They softly laughed. Roses hand lay around her granddaughters waist. Gail stood still in the door frame crossing her arms. She would be superfluous here.

After a moment Rose turned around and looked at her.

"There you are. I´m sorry for being rude about that dismissing thing but you are too young to always eat on your own."

Gail smiled angrily. "Just wanted to give you some family time."  
>"How thoughtful of you." Rose looked amused. "But we like the company. Would you set the tables, girls?"<p>

Holly and Gail did as they were told, both avoiding to look at each other. As the three of them sat down, Rose threw a look from Gail to Holly as if she was waiting for something. Whatever it was she expected, Gail didn´t want to give it to her. She looked at her plate. Her pancakes felt hard to swallow this morning.

Holly sighed and finally started the conversation. "So…" She swallowed and didn´t look up from her plate. "So you like it here, Gail?"

Somehow her words once again provoked Gails anger. She didn´t want that girl from Toronto to show any interest in her. She didn´t want to answer. She didn´t want to be here. In front of Rose she had to do her best to keep face. She loudly let her cutlery fall on her plate and grabbed the edge of the table before she answered though.  
>"I love it." Fake grin. "Hope you´re enjoying your time off?"<br>Holly looked at Gails fingers turning white as she still clutched the table. She threw a seriously confused look at Gail but kept the conversation going.

"I love Toronto, that´s where I study… Big city and so much to do and everything, but you know… This is my home? It´s always great to come here."

It was about the worst she could have said. All Gail heard was: "Toronto. Home. Great to come here," as she looked into Hollys pretty and confused face. The words hurt Gail to the bones as she remembered the Toronto skyline, her parent´s house and all the cold it seemed to radiate, her school and all those faces she had left behind with their ugly expressions. It obviously showed. This time it was Holly who dropped her cutlery as she looked at her.

"Did I say something wrong?"

"No." Gail kept her breath then tried her best to put her fake smile on again. "No, just… just choked on my pancake." It was the only thing she could think of to answer. It sounded terribly stupid even to herself.  
>Holly gave Gail an insecure smile as she bit her lips and showed her perfectly white teeth. Why did she have to be this perfect? And why couldn´t Gail just be like that?<p>

Rose, too, looked confused as she began to speak.

"We have a bit to do these days," she said. "We have a communal night this weekend so we need to prepare some stuff. And the summer cottage needs to be prepared soon, too. So, you´ll have some extra work the next days, Gail. Maybe you want to take the day off? Dov and Holly might take you to town if you want to?"

"No, I don´t… I don´t need a day off really. Please. Maybe some other day I can choose?" Holly and Rose both still looked at her with big confused eyes. Gail only wished to go back to her room. This was horrible.

"Fine," Rose answered. "Sure, that´s a good idea."  
>They silently continued their breakfast. Fortunately a few seconds later Dov came into the kitchen and shortly after he and Holly left. Gail stood at the window and watched Dovs huge truck leaving with folded arms. After a moment she felt Rose standing behind her. She put her hand carefully at Gails shoulder. Gail knew she meant to comfort her. Comfort was something she eagerly craved for. But somehow that hand on her shoulder made her feel nothing but shame and reluctance. As Rose seemed to sense that she took her hand away. Gail felt both relieved and even more alone.<p> 


End file.
